[ten things i know to be true]

1. Change tastes like tears-- the celebratory kind and the dripping heart kind together and all at once.
   
2. Sixpence None the Richer's version of "Silent Night" is the best I've ever heard.
3. ^ That music video is hecka scary. I know cuz I just found it and watched it. I think it's the eyes.
   
4. It's next to impossible for me to keep my room clean for 3 consecutive days.
5. I'm being re-wired even now; I'm trying to unlearn unhealthy habits, behaviors, and beliefs that I've clung to since childhood. It's hard.
   
6. The promise of bacon in the morning can get me up like no other. Not even 3 alarms can pull that off quite as well.
7. "Coming To America" is by far Eddie Murphy's best movie. So quotable! "To be loved, to be loved! Ohhhh what a feeling-- to be loved!"
8. That "Tangled" scene with the parents running to meet her (at the very end) gets me every time. Every. Single. Time. (Ask me about it sometime and I'll for sure get all weepy on you).
9. I am physically unable to see chocolate-covered strawberries and not buy them. (This may be a lie, but there's truth in it).
10. Deep down everyone just wants to be known and accepted and loved-- in spite of themselves.
    

Earth's creator, Everyday God,
Loving Maker, O Jesus,
You who shaped us, O Spirit,
Recreate us, Come, be with us.

In your presence, Everyday God,
We are gathered, O Jesus,
You have called us, O Spirit,
To restore us, Come, be with us.

Life of all lives, Everyday God,
Love of all loves, O Jesus,
Hope of all hopes, O Spirit,
Light of all lights, Come, be with us.

In our resting, Everyday God,
In our rising, O Jesus,
In our hoping, O Spirit,
In our waiting, Come, be with us.

In our dreaming, Everyday God,
In our daring, O Jesus,
In our searching, O Spirit,
In our sharing, Come, be with us.

God of laughter, Everyday God,
God of sorrow, O Jesus,
Home and shelter, O Spirit,
Strong and patient, Come, be with us.

Way of freedom, Everyday God,
Star of morning, O Jesus,
Timeless healer, O Spirit,
Flame eternal, Come, be with us.

Word of gladness, Everyday God,
Word of mercy, O Jesus,
Word of friendship, O Spirit,
Word of challenge, Come, be with us.

Our beginning, Everyday God,
Our unfolding, O Jesus,
Our enduring, O Spirit,
Journey's ending, Come, be with us.

Alleluia, Everyday God,
Now and always, O Jesus,
Alleluia, O Spirit,
Through all ages, Come, be with us.

[NEWS]

I LOVE MY NEPHEW AND MY GODSON
THEY ARE SO FREAKING CUTE OH MAH GAHHHHRSH!!


Just sayin'. :)

"can't stand it // i know ya planned it"

i eat oatmeal at four in the morning.
i google lyrics to obscure songs.
i pace.
i organize files on my computer.
i play bejeweled.
i hide.

[hear me through my silence]

(this has my fingerprints all over it
and it reeks of the familiar).

i remember losing my balance,
being bent over backwards
and tossed about in the waves.
i remember pleas that i cried out on keys
at hours of the night when nothing good ever happens.
i remember the calls i'm ashamed i made
thinking that if could draw out tendrils of feeling--
even if it was pity--
i could draw it about me like a blanket.
i never stopped to think
that i'd lose me in the process.

i see you. and i'm sorry.
but i can't be the one to fix you.
and sometimes it's better to be broken... first.
would you let Him pick up the pieces that you and i can't?

(this is for me too).

[my questions are never fair]

it's about control - and this is why i clean my room - why my floor is immaculate tonight - this morning - why my pens are all the right side up and my receipts are all in order - this is why my dollar bills all face the same way and why my books line my shelves - it's my way of saying my world is alright - that there are things i can fix - that i can force to stay - and be - here - in this way

[the leaves are changing and flying by]

This morning he asked me to describe this phase of my life in one sentence.

this odd transition year, filled to the brim with change. learning how to live this post-grad life. how to maintain friendships and try to branch out for new ones at the same time-- feeling defiant and lonely at the same time. longing for a time when friends were less than a phone call away-- they were right down the street or right down the hall or next door. figuring out community and ministry in a new place. being in a new place! working with a team-- learning how to be. finding my voice, rediscovering myself in a sense. or maybe just re-establishing. being a shoulder and a nudge, a comfort and a push at the same time. learning how to love and challenge in one fell swoop. knowing just when things start to gel that i'll need to leave. feeling the urgency of the temporary. constant change, always whooshing past me. whirling around me. on to the next thing. uprooting and re-planting like steps to a dance i don't know quite yet. stumbling and bumbling over my own feet and choices and breaths.

Indeed. The leaves are changing and flying by. It's all I can do to keep from getting bowled over.